On Day 1162...
I have been feeling very "gray" lately. I can't really find another word to describe it. Do you ever wake up some mornings and realize you are soo far from where you wanted to be at this point in your life? That you are just living moment to moment, without a purpose, no goal, no motivation to move beyond the urgent...
Well, that has been my life of late. I have been working far more than full-time, which was a main reason we moved away from Washington D.C. and yet now I find myself falling back into the same patterns. The perfectionist in me takes over and overrides my reason/better judgment and life falls by the wayside... being a good friend (to others and to my husband), exercising, regular quiet time with God, healthy/real meals, a clean house... you name it. The calm is gone and frustration and exhaustion have taken its place.
I guess baby steps are the only way to quit the cycle. I have stopped working one day a week and have started getting up earlier, exercising and making time with God. It is a step, but I still haven't found the balance between living with purpose and enjoying each day... I suppose it will probably be a life-long question.
L
4 comments:
I'm totally w/ya on this. Too bad we don't live in the same time zone so we could call each other to get up on time or close enough to work out together. Ah, heaven's gonna rock.
I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes I stop and look behind me at the past several months. How does time pass so quickly? In the blink of an eye.
I have found it definitely helps to make time for the Lord. Some how, even though time does not freeze, it feels like it does.
the enire time i was reading this blog, i thought you were talking about me and my life. i feel the same way alot of the time. i keep thinking that i need to find something to do with myself for the next two years while i'm waiting for Ryan to be done with school. what that is, i have no idea and that's where the problems start. i have a few idea's but nothing has happened to that end yet. God is faithful and i'm sure that something will work out. maybe i'll just move out there!!!!!
Wait until you have children! It only gets worse.
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